Friday, October 28, 2011

Katelynn LeighAnn!



Katelynn is here! My 3rd and last niece. I feel a little sad about that but, I am so glad to have 3 healthy happy nieces and nephew. We were in Colorado Springs when she was born though we waited until the morning to see her. We spent the weekend in and out of the hospital and playing with my niece Elli and nephew Asher. We had so much fun.

My dad was able to be there and it was such a treat to spend some time with him and my kids. They adore him and could not get enough of him. There is nothing like hearing your children play with their Papa. Blaire was thrilled to pieces to see him and Presleigh warmed up to Papa right away.

It was such a wonderful time to share in the birth of one of my nieces, since the other two were born in Missoula, and I had to wait until I had a break to travel to see them. I feel so blessed and can't wait for my sister to come and join us when our baby 3rd baby is born!

Conferences!

Today, I sat on the other side of the table. I was the mom listening to the teacher tell me how they thought MY child was doing. While I knew generally that Blaire was doing just fine, I was a little nervous to hear someones evaluation of my child, my precious baby girl.

Please don't take me as a parent that feels that their child does no wrong. I know good and well that is not the case. But, I wasn't sure how I would feel if the teacher had an issue with her or had something to "discuss". Thankfully, today was not the day that happened. She had a great report. But, it helped me to understand a little how my parents feel when they come into my room.

Monday, October 10, 2011

What do I do?!


This past summer we went to Southeast Missouri to visit my grandparents. While we were there it was pretty evident that my grandfather was not doing as well as he had been doing. He would normally get on the floor with the kids(albeit sore the next morning) and play with them. This time there was none of that and while I can't even tell you what else was different, I could just tell.

Well, the past few weeks, my grandfather has been in an out of the hospital. They seemed to have stabilized him but he doesn't seem to be bouncing back like we had hoped. After a diagnosis of congestive heart failure and the evidence of prior and recurring strokes, it is hard to say what the timetable is. This I do know, our bodies are only temporary, and my grandfather knows he will be with Jesus and my mother in Heaven in a new body! Praise God!

I however, seem to be in a constant state of ponder, frustration and worry all in one. After my mom passed away, my grandparents made the decision to move back to Missouri. While they do have some family that is helping to care for them, I feel very discontented that I am not the one helping my grandma care for my grandpa. I know that the decisions that have been made were not ones I had any control over but this is not helping my present state of mind.

I feel on the very edge of loosing it. With everything else I am trying to balance, this feels a little like the straw that broke the camels back. I know that God will not give me more than I can handle. But for those of you who read this that pray, I could use some extra support in prayer right now. I am struggling.