We were blessed to find out we were expecting a baby. We were thrilled at the news and started making a plan of attack as to how to make room for the new baby given that we live in a smaller home.
We were getting bunkbeds ready and had talked the girls about getting a new baby brother or sister.
Unfortunately, this past week I started experiencing some complications and found out that the baby had not grown past 2 weeks gestation. We were devastated. The last couple of days have been an emotional rollercoaster. I have grieved the loss of my mom and I understood that kind of loss, but this is very different and I am not sure at this point if I can put it into words what I am feeling except I was in love with that little clump of cells that most likely never even developed a heartbeat. I was in love with the baby I imagined it to be. Though a clump of cells it was very much my baby and had life though for only a short amount of time.
How I imagine that baby now. She is with Jesus and my mom has that baby in her arms in her perfect little body.
